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THE BIGGEST WEDDING PLANNING MISTAKE COUPLES MAKE (AND HOW TO AVOID IT)


Every single one of my destination wedding planning journeys with a new client starts with the same conversation. And no, it's not about flowers or first dances or colour palettes—it's about vision versus feasibility. It’s the conversation that sets expectations, helps align dreams with reality, and—most importantly—ensures you don’t make the biggest and most expensive mistake couples make when planning a destination wedding in Europe: choosing the region (or even the venue) before understanding your budget and priorities.

If you’re planning a wedding in Europe, and you're based in the U.S., this article is your essential starting point. As a high end destination wedding planner, I’ve been planning weddings across France, Italy, Montenegro, Germany, Spain and the UK for over a decade, and I can tell you from experience: where you choose to get married is about so much more than how it looks in photos. Location isn’t just a vibe—it’s a strategy.

Step One: Define Your Budget (Before You Even Google a Venue)

A great wedding planner will help you build a comprehensive, realistic and customised financial overview before you ever put a planning deposit down. Why? Because your wedding budget isn’t just a number—it’s what determines which countries, regions, and styles of venues are actually available to you.

Dreaming of rolling hills and olive trees? Both Provence and Tuscany deliver. But the same vision will come at very different price points. Provence, particularly over the past five years, has become one of France’s most expensive regions for destination weddings—attracting ultra-high-end clientele and driving up prices across everything from venue rentals to makeup artists. Tuscany, on the other hand, still offers excellent value, especially for mid- to large-sized weddings.

And it's not only about the venue. As I discuss below, there are knock on costs that vary as much as the landscape. So many couples come to me, delighted, having just signed a contract for a venue that fits in their budget—blissfully ignorant to the fact that the inevitable associated costs do not. This leads to one of two unpleasant situations: an increasing budget or compromises. Both of which I preferably avoid like the plague when planning a wedding.

Step Two: Think About the Vibe

“Rustic but elegant” means something very different in Bordeaux than it does in Puglia. Are you imagining a faded-stone estate surrounded by olive groves? A grand château with a mirrored ballroom? Waterside views? Sunset dinners in the hills?

Each region in Europe has its own architectural personality and natural charm. Knowing whether you’re drawn to 18th-century French classicism or Renaissance Tuscan farmhouses will help me (or your planner) narrow down the right region—before you get swept up in venue searching rabbit holes online.

Step Three: Guest Travel & Access

When your guests are flying internationally, location impacts experience just as much as scenery. If they’re coming from the U.S., chances are they’ll be landing in cities like Paris, Milan, Rome, Barcelona or Munich. From there, you need to consider how easily guests can travel on to your venue.

That’s why I often recommend Bordeaux or Avignon in France. Both are accessible from Paris via the TGV high-speed train, taking just over 2 hours and 3 hours respectively. These hubs cut down on travel stress—and I can help you coordinate group transfers to get everyone to the venue with ease. In more remote regions, local taxis can be hard to come by (and expensive), so thinking this through early matters.

In Italy, onward travel might involve a quick domestic flight (Rome to Florence, for example) or high-speed rail. Guests often turn these trips into mini-Europe adventures. For example, for an Amalfi Coast wedding they may link London to Paris via the Eurostar and then fly on to Naples before heading to the coast in a taxi. I often advise against guests driving in places like the Amalfi Coast, where narrow roads and hairpin bends (not to mention the local driving etiquette) make it less than ideal for a nervous tourist!

Step Four: Venue Size – Why History Matters

In France, the number of guests a venue can sleep varies hugely depending on where you are—and history explains why. In Normandy or the Loire Valley, châteaux were built for kings, queens, and their entourages. Some of these estates can sleep 60 to 100+ guests.

Head south, and you’ll find a different story. In Provence or Gascony, estates were often hunting lodges or private retreats. They were never intended to house dozens of guests, which means many venues in these areas top out around 20–40 beds.

In Italy, the picture depends more on geography and infrastructure. Around the more built up and population-dense Italian Lakes and Amalfi Coast, villas tend to be smaller, and full hotel buyouts are rare due to the size and capacity of these venues. Instead, weddings often take place in hotels or hotel owned villas without bedrooms, with guests being housed either on the hotel grounds or in hotels/B&Bs within close proximity. This works well if the area has solid tourism infrastructure (e.g. the larger towns around the lakes: Menaggio, Stresa etc.).

Meanwhile, Tuscany is an outlier—thanks to the Medici family, who built sprawling estates known as Borghi. These were once self-contained villages, and many now function as beautiful wedding venues, with enough space to sleep 80–100+ guests comfortably.


Step Five: Understand Regional Costs (And How They Add Up)

Two venues may look similar online, but the region they’re in can make a world of difference financially. In Provence and Paris, you're in high-demand zones. Here’s a rough guide to illustrate:

  • A top-tier caterer in Bordeaux: €150/head

  • The same quality in Provence or Paris: €300–€400/head

  • High-end hair & makeup for the bride only in the South West: from €600

  • In Paris or Provence: €800–€2,000+

These differences aren’t just limited to France. In Italy, regions like Tuscany and Umbria remain great value, while areas like Lake Como, the Amalfi Coast, and even Puglia are significantly more expensive—driven in part by regional socio economic status (essentially the cost of living for vendors based there) but largely by social media exposure and celebrity weddings.


Let's Compare: Provence vs. Tuscany

Say you’re dreaming of rolling hills, olive trees and cypress-lined driveways. Your two main options are Provence or Tuscany. If you have 50 guests and a €200,000 budget, Provence may be perfect. But if you have the same budget and 150 guests, Tuscany will give you far more without having to compromise on quality or experience.

What If You Want Sea Views?

In France, it’s not easy. Apart from a few venues on the Atlantic coast (like Villa Tosca, one of my personal favourites), ocean views are rare and expensive.

In Italy, it’s a different story. The Italian Lakes—Como, Maggiore, Garda—offer stunning vistas and a wide range of options. On the Amalfi Coast, hotel venues often work with packages that don’t even require a venue hire fee—if you book enough rooms or meals, the space is included. That flexibility can be a huge asset.

Final Thoughts (and Your First Step)

After more than a decade of planning weddings across Europe, I’ve learned that where you get married shapes everything else: your budget, your guest experience, your logistics, and your aesthetic.

I never work from a fixed list of venues. Every search I do is completely bespoke, based on your values, vision, and guest dynamics. Venues close. New ones open. Prices shift. Trends evolve. And the right match today may not be the one tomorrow.

So, before you fall in love with a location on Instagram, let’s talk. Book a no-obligation intro call with me here and let’s make sure your dream wedding starts in the right place—for all the right reasons.

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